Where the Grass is Green and the Girls are Pretty

 

Did I check out this book because of the title and my 90s girl dedication to Guns n Roses?

Yes.

Was I punished for my superficiality?

Also yes.

I'll keep it brief. 

The book is yet ANOTHER novel that nods back the Aunt Becky/Varsity Blues/college admissions scandal. In this book, a prominent network news anchor gets caught up in the story she's supposed to be covering when her own husband gets arrested in an FBI sting, and accused of paying someone to get her daughter into college. 

The story isn't exactly what it seems on the surface, but the plot reveals itself so quickly, you find yourself wondering "What are we going to do with the other 350+ pages? Hum the guitar solo for November Rain? Learn to really whistle that opening on Patience? Seeing if I can get my hair like Slash?" All of those would have been better options that reading this book all the way through, which I did. 

There was one final plot twist at the end, but by then, I was so ready for it to be over, I literally rolled my eyes and closed the cover.

And do you want to know the worst part? That title was never even relevant in the story at all.

I'm back to judging books by their cover, not their title. 

And because I need you to leave this page with something positive, I give you MY favorite GNR song.

Better Not Bitter

 

Like so many of you, I hear the story of Yusef Salaam and I can't quite understand how he's not angry and bitter and constantly outraged about the injustice that brought his name into the international spotlight. But, when I ask myself that, I come back to a news story I did years ago with a couple that lost all five of their children in a horrible car accident. The kids were all under the age of 10. The parents, who are devoutly religious, told me they hear people say that all the time. Then, the mother said something I will never forget:

"God doesn't give grace to the onlooker."

Of course we can't understand why Salaam - one of the Exonerated Five from the Central Park Jogger case - has come to the peaceful and rational way of seeing the world and his experience. It's not our experience to know. But, reading his book and hearing him share his story gives some insight to all of us about the mindset with which we can see the world in order to not let it break us.

Salaam was one of the five teenagers sent to prison in one of the most notorious miscarriages of justice in the zeitgeist. He served his time and was out before the real rapist was identified. Their story became known to so many more people in the Netflix documentary Now They See Us. This book allows us to see them - Salaam, at least - even more fully.

He describes his mother walking in on his interrogation and telling him - you don't have to participate in this. He describes going to the courthouse to hear the verdict thinking he'll be right back, not knowing he wouldn't see his home for many years. And he describes turning to education and religion in prison to put himself in this mindset of facing this hardship - and, life after - by going through it, not shaking his fist at the sky.

This book and Salaam's message also show the powerful ways in which the system is set up to incarcerate Black people, especially Black men. There's so much literature on this subject right now, but to hear it from the man who serves as an example of how much can go so wrong, you can't help but feel that message in a different way.

Girls With Bright Futures

 

You know that whole college scandal with the fake rowing scholarships and Aunt Becky and all of that? If recent fiction is any indication, half the authors in America heard that story and said to themselves "THAT would be a good book!"

In my experience, though, none of them have even come close to the juicy reality.

Now is the time in the review where I make a confession. I barely remember the plot of this book. In my defense, I read it about a month ago and haven't had time to write a review. But, also, I just accidentally read ANOTHER book with this plot and both were equally unmemorable. They're books about overzealous moms, anxiety-ridden teenage girls (because of said moms) and the increasingly insane world of college admissions.

Do I recommend you read this? Literally, I don't know. I should have paid someone to write this review for me instead.

Year Book

No matter what I say here about Seth Rogen's book of essays/memoir, do yourself a favor: don't read it.

Wait, I mean read it. But, don't READ it. Have Seth read you the audiobook version instead.

I'm not saying that because I didn't love actually reading this hilarious book. I just imagine it would be even better to hear him talk about his life in his words, along with that trademark laugh. So, even though I read it, I may listen to it now, too. 

I mean, imagine how much funnier it would be to hear Seth Rogen describe how Kanye randomly showed up at his house one day and asked if Seth could come out and play basketball? I picture, like, the random kid down the street who comes over and asks my 10-year old son to play.. then picture Kanye walking away when Seth couldn't come out and play that day. The whole Kanye story in this book is worth the price of the download, not to mention his story about Snoop writing a rap for a project they were working on when a group of muse/stripper ladies came in out of nowhere to inspire him.

I listened to Rogen on a few podcasts before reading this book and his performance there was the perfect foreshadowing for what this book would be: funny, endearing and really sweet. And, yeah, a lot of stories about drugs. 

I'm a fan of Seth Rogen's anyway, but reading this gives you such insight into how he became a boy-wonder Canadian comic and the friendships he's formed that have helped him throughout his career.

Go read it. With your ears. 

 

Stay Sexy & Don't Get Murdered

 

This was supposed to be a throw-away bridge book - a book I read while waiting for my library holds to show up. I picked it up during one of my random Target wanderings on a Sunday afternoon. I'd heard of it before, just as I've heard people rave for years about the authors' podcast My Favorite Murder. But, I hadn't listened to the podcast and I didn't know a thing about these women. Somehow, it ended up in my cart.

Then, I read it in one day.

I must be the same age as Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardtsark because the life experiences they detail here were astonishingly close to home. I laughed so much (more like a cackle, really) from the beginning to the end.

It's not a book about crime/murder. But, clearly, it's about what really makes their podcast successful: they're really funny women who happen to be great storytellers, too.

The book reads like a how-to guide for life, but really is just sharing stories about their different upbringings and how they ended up on the top of so many podcast charts.

Malibu Rising

 

Has a book ever looked and sounded more like a beach read than Malibu Rising? And this gorgeous cover? It screams summer. But, I would hate for you to dismiss it as somehow not having weight just because the title is in pink. Taylor Jenkins Reid books always have a shark-ish mood just beneath the surface.

If you've been on this blog for awhile, you've read reviews of other books by this author. Daisy Jones and the Six and Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo are among my all-time faves. Like those, Malibu Rising has a strong female lead, though her story is not quite as tortured as Daisy's and Evelyn's.

You know how the book is going to end right as it begins. The opening paragraphs talk about Malibu as a land that burns. Fires seem to define this area of California almost as much as the mansions and celebrities. We know this book will end with Malibu in flames. We just have to see how it gets there.

At its heart, it's a story about the Riva family that grew up in early 80's Malibu. It's a story of their lives as grown-ups and the story of how their parents got together. Dad was a bonafide celebrity who drifted in and out of their lives. Mom ran the family restaurant, barely keeping up. That back story defines them all. It's about family sacrifice, sibling relationships and what's often under the surface of the people that you think have it all.

I read this book in a weekend, not on the beach, but on my couch. It didn't have quite the same glow for me as her previous two books that I loved, but it's the perfect book to read on a flight - or a beach - this summer.